Do One Thing Everyday That Scares You

I don't mind public speaking. I do it often in front of clients..in meetings, etc. Yet something about standing up in front of mucho native Spanish speakers - and speaking their language - scares the shiza out of me.

...so yesterday I did just that. We received recognition in front of the other students and most of the teachers for our time here at Casa Xelaju. I had to thank the school and my teacher and I (tried) to crack a joke. In espanol. Ei. Yi. Yi.

Thursday we had a delicious Italian farewell dinner and enjoyed a night of pool and dancing with the amigos we've made here. And yesterday was it. My teacher gave me an angel pendant to watch over me in the pursuit of my dreams and we both shed some tears. It's crazy how quickly time flies.

Rompopo. The delicious drink we want to
find out how to export made of rum, egg yolk,
sugar, cinnamon and nutmeg.

Just another example of my hostess' amazing meals.
Dessert of fresh cherries & peaches heated and Orcheta
to drink. She's the best.

Their adorable grandaughter Ana Sofia
whom lives upstairs.

Italians know how to do it.

My crew at the school whom I will miss mucho mucho.
En serio.

I am sad about leaving my teacher, my family & friends here, I think about how I had to leave somewhere and someone else to get here. It's inevitable and an ongoing cycle of new beginnings... and some people and experiences will stick and turn out to be old friends...

Leaving Esparanza and the family this morning was bittersweet, both because we were lucky to have time together and also because it was 5:30 a.m. Eeek. Esparanza gave us a sweet card with this message (from Henri Nouwen's book, Gracias), "True missioners are people who are hunting for the divine treasures hidden in the heart of the people to whom they want to make the good news known. They always expect to see the beauty and truth of *a Higher Power* shining through those with whom they live and work. The more in touch we are with our own need for healing, the more open we are to receive in gratitude what others have to offer us. One of the most rewarding aspects of being in a strange land is the experience of being loved not for what we can do, but for who we are (at our core). When we become aware that we are loved even when we hardly progress, we can let go of our compulsion to prove ourselves and be free to live with others in fellowship of the weak. That is true healing."

It made me tear up to read this. Not only do I feel loved by people I just met two weeks ago, but I feel as if I was my true self with them. The more experiences I have that push me out of my comfort zone, the more I begin to realize what that true Self is. And the more places I go, the more I remember that wherever you go, there you are. If you go with all your heart, you can always create family around you.

Now? I'm on a bus to El Salvador. We will be in official "intern interview" mode to see if these development projects will be a good fit for me to come back too next spring...for months rather than weeks. I have to be sure it's a fit with my vida too..so we'll see. Right now I have no idea where I'll be living in a couple months so I'm not sure how to be sure about next year. Right?

As I write and we pass the mountains and countryside, I'm just very appreciative for this time I have here. Buen provecho and muchas gracias, Universe. Love.